Turning Pain into Purpose: Catilda Frazer’s Transformative Book ‘My Experience with H.I.M.: Surviving Intimate Partner Violence’

We had the pleasure of interviewing Catilda Frazer, a remarkable individual whose journey from a humble upbringing in Jamaica to becoming a successful entrepreneur and advocate for empowerment is nothing short of inspiring. Through unwavering determination and a commitment to education, Catilda forged a path to success, eventually establishing her own Grant Consulting business, “Catilda’s Consulting Services,” dedicated to supporting women-owned small businesses. But her journey didn’t stop there; faced with the painful realities of intimate partner violence, Catilda channeled her strength into a transformative memoir, “My Experience with H.I.M.: Surviving Intimate Partner Violence,” becoming a beacon of hope and healing for countless others. 

Join us as we delve into Catilda Frazer’s life, her passion for empowering others, and the impact she is making through her story and consultancy endeavors.

Hi Catilda, Great to have you with us today! Please share with our readers about your journey.

Hi, I was born in the picturesque parish of Westmoreland, Jamaica, into a humble and economically challenged household. Despite the difficulties that I faced during my tumultuous upbringing, I had an unwavering determination to rise above my circumstances and create a life better than the one I was born into.

Education played a significant role in shaping my path towards success. I pursued higher learning with dedication and earned a Bachelor of Arts in Language Communication and Society from the prestigious University of the West Indies, Jamaica. Later, I went on to achieve a Master of Science in Public Policy from Peking University in Beijing, China. Throughout my academic journey, I held on to the guiding principles of the educational institutions I attended: “A Sound Mind in a Sound Body” from Frome Technical and “We Create our own Destiny” from Black River High School.

After completing my education and gaining some experience in the Insurance Industry, I discovered my true passion was in the field of Rural Development. Driven by my experiences and insights, I found my niche as a Grant Specialist and excelled in this domain, eventually establishing my own successful business. Yet, my desire to create a positive impact extended beyond my professional endeavors. Taking my dedication to the next level, I became a fervent advocate for the empowerment of youth and women. This newfound purpose fueled my commitment to make a meaningful difference in the lives of those I encountered, leaving a lasting legacy of empowerment and progress.

Fueled by my unwavering passion for making a difference in the lives of others, I took the next significant step in my academic journey. Eager to deepen my knowledge and expertise in Human Services, I enrolled in a doctoral program at Walden University. This decision was driven by my desire to acquire a comprehensive understanding of the field and to equip myself with the tools necessary to create a more profound and lasting impact on the communities and individuals I serve. With each stride forward in my doctoral studies, I am committed to honing my skills and nurturing a profound sense of empathy and compassion, as I believe these are the cornerstones of effecting positive change in the world.

Throughout my journey, I have dedicated my time and efforts to various meaningful causes. Volunteering has been an integral part of my life, and I have had the privilege of serving organizations like the Canadian Cancer Society, EmpowHerto, Goodwill Industries of Alberta: You Can Ride 2. These experiences have not only enriched my life but have also allowed me to make a positive impact on the lives of others. Each organization’s mission resonates deeply with me, and I find great fulfillment in contributing to each endeavor. With every volunteer opportunity, I strive to bring hope, support, and empowerment to those in need, fostering a sense of community and compassion that leaves an enduring mark on hearts and minds.

Moving to Canada with hopes of starting a new chapter alongside my husband should have been filled with joy and excitement. However, my journey took an unexpected and painful turn as I discovered infidelity and faced the horrors of Intimate Partner Violence (IPV). Having endured Intimate Partner Violence (IPV), I decided to channel my pain and strength into a meaningful endeavor. I poured my heart into authoring the book “My Experience with H.I.M.: Surviving Intimate Partner Violence.” By documenting my own harrowing journey and how I managed to overcome the challenges, I aimed to bring attention to the issue of intimate partner violence and extend a helping hand to fellow survivors. Through the power of my words, I sought to shed light on this pressing problem and provide much-needed support and solace to others who have endured similar ordeals.

Please tell us more about your book, My Experience with H.I.M.: Surviving Intimate Partner Violence.

In “My Experience with H.I.M.: Surviving Intimate Partner Violence,” I bared my soul, recounting the difficult moments, the fears that haunted me, and the courage it took to break free from the cycle of abuse. I knew that sharing my story could be a catalyst for change, both in my life and in the lives of countless others who may have felt trapped and voiceless.

The book became a platform to raise awareness about the different forms of intimate partner violence, emphasizing the importance of recognizing the signs and reaching out for help. By weaving my own personal narrative with insights and information on resources available to survivors, I aimed to empower others to take the first step towards healing and liberation.

Writing “My Experience with H.I.M.” wasn’t an easy task. Reliving the painful memories and confronting the trauma required immense strength, but I knew it was necessary to create a comprehensive account of the journey from victim to survivor. It was a journey not just of survival but also of growth, resilience, and empowerment.

As the book found its way into the hands of readers, the response was overwhelming. Survivors found comfort in knowing they were not alone, and others were awakened to the reality of intimate partner violence, realizing the importance of supporting those affected by it.

But my mission is not stop with the book’s publication. I want to become an advocate, participating in awareness campaigns, collaborating with organizations dedicated to ending intimate partner violence, and providing support to survivors seeking assistance. I stand tall as a living testament that healing was possible and that we were not defined by the scars of our past but by the strength and resilience we displayed in overcoming them.

The journey of sharing “My Experience with H.I.M.” had its challenges, but it also became a journey of catharsis for me. It allowed me to reclaim my voice and recover. The feedback I received from survivors who had been touched by my story fueled my determination to continue making a difference.

My Experience with H.I.M.: Surviving Intimate Partner Violence” is more than just a book; it is a testament to the strength of the human spirit and the power of sharing our truths. As I continue this journey, I know that the road ahead may be challenging, but I remain steadfast in my commitment to making a lasting impact and helping survivors reclaim their lives, one step at a time.

Beyond my professional accomplishments, I have a voracious appetite for knowledge. I am an avid reader, often finding solace and inspiration in the works of authors like Howard Phillips (H.P.) Lovecraft, Dean Koontz, and Agatha Christie. This love for literature has further enriched my perspectives and fueled my creativity.

At the core of my character lies an unwavering resilience and resourcefulness, traits that have guided me on a path of empowerment and positive change. Driven by these qualities, I took a courageous leap forward and founded “Catilda’s Consulting Services,” a venture dedicated to making a difference in the lives of women-owned small businesses. Through my consultancy, I am committed to providing comprehensive Grant research services, with the ultimate goal of helping these inspiring entrepreneurs secure essential funding for their ventures.

Drawing from my own experiences and challenges, I understand the hurdles faced by small businesses, particularly those led by women in a competitive world. Thus, I made it my mission to bridge the gap between ambition and opportunity, offering personalized support to entrepreneurs who often find themselves in need of financial assistance to unlock their true potential.

Please share with our readers about ‘Catilda’s Consulting Services.’

Catilda’s Consulting Services” serves as a guiding light for aspiring business owners, illuminating the complex grant landscape and offering tailored solutions to match their unique needs. I firmly believe that access to funding shouldn’t be a roadblock for talent and innovation, and I am dedicated to breaking down barriers and paving the way for success.

Through my consultancy, I aspire to foster an ecosystem of support where women-owned small businesses can flourish, thrive, and make significant contributions to society. Empowering these individuals not only benefits their own enterprises but also creates a ripple effect of progress, strengthening economies and promoting gender equality in the business world.

As I continue on this journey, I remain committed to uplifting and championing the dreams of women entrepreneurs. My unwavering resilience and resourcefulness serve as beacons of hope, guiding me through challenges and inspiring others to persevere in pursuit of their dreams. With “Catilda’s Consulting Services” by their side, I am determined to make a lasting difference, one grant at a time.


What are the strategies that helped you become successful in your journey? 

Resilience and Determination: My ability to overcome a tumultuous upbringing and face challenges head-on with resilience and determination has been crucial in my journey. It has allowed me to push through obstacles and stay focused on my goals, ultimately leading to my success.

Educational Pursuits: Pursuing higher education has been a significant strategy in my journey towards success. My academic achievements, including a Master’s degree and enrollment in a doctoral program, have provided me with valuable knowledge and skills to excel in my chosen field.

Finding Passion and Purpose: Identifying my passion in the field of Rural Development and subsequently becoming a Grant Specialist has been a key factor in my success. Having a sense of purpose in my work drives me to excel and create a positive impact.

Entrepreneurial Spirit: Founding “Catilda’s Consulting Services” was a bold and transformative step that exemplified my entrepreneurial spirit, especially during a challenging period when I was recovering from separation and IPV. Despite facing adversity, I channeled my expertise and passion into creating a consultancy that caters to the unique needs of women-owned small businesses. This strategic move not only empowered me personally but also allowed me to make a positive impact by providing essential support and resources to fellow entrepreneurs on their journey to success.

Advocacy and Empowerment: Going beyond my professional endeavors and advocating for youth and women empowerment showcases my commitment to creating positive change beyond my own sphere. My dedication to empowering others has contributed to my overall success.

Volunteering and Community Engagement: Engaging in volunteer work with organizations like the Canadian Cancer Society, EmpowHerto, Goodwill Industries of Alberta, and You Can Ride 2 has been an essential strategy. These experiences have not only enriched my life but also allowed me to make a significant impact on the lives of others, fostering a sense of fulfillment and purpose.

Continuous Learning and Growth: My love for reading and continuous pursuit of knowledge through literature and my educational journey have nurtured my personal growth and professional development, enabling me to adapt and thrive in diverse environments.

Focus on Empathy and Compassion: my genuine concern for the well-being of others, as evidenced in my book “My Experience with H.I.M.: Surviving Intimate Partner Violence,” has enabled me to connect with people on a deeper level, fostering trust and support in my interactions.

By combining these strategies, I have navigated a path of success, making a positive impact on myself and the communities I touch. My resilience, education, passion, and dedication to empowering others have undoubtedly been the driving forces behind my achievements.

Any message for our readers?

My message to readers is one of hope, resilience, and empowerment. Through the ups and downs of life, I have learned that challenges can be opportunities for growth and transformation. My journey is a testament to the power of perseverance and the strength that lies within us to overcome adversity.

I want to inspire others to embrace their own resilience and follow their passions, no matter how daunting the obstacles may seem. Whether it’s through education, entrepreneurship, advocacy, or volunteer work, each of us has the potential to make a positive impact on the world around us.

In the face of difficult circumstances, I found solace in books and literature, which taught me valuable lessons about life and the human experience. I encourage everyone to nurture a love for learning and never stop seeking knowledge.

As a survivor of intimate partner violence, I want to reach out to those who may be facing similar challenges and let them know that they are not alone. There is strength in sharing our stories, and I hope that my book “My Experience with H.I.M.: Surviving Intimate Partner Violence” serves as a source of support and healing for others on their journey to recovery.

I invite you all to join me in embracing your own resilience and embracing the power within you to create positive change. Let us work together to build a brighter tomorrow for ourselves and our communities. Remember, no matter where you are in life, your journey is unique and valuable, and you have the potential to make a difference. Together, we can create a world where hope and empowerment flourish.

So tell us, how can people find out more about you?

You can follow me on Facebook for more information.

Thank you so much, Catilda, for giving us your precious time! We wish you all the best for your journey ahead!


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